Rock the Goat

From Delirium Dog

[read original post here]

Tia Nina: “Pitchin’ The Tent” at Single Carrot Theater, Baltimore. March 14th, 2014

I cannot believe nobody has tried this yet: form an all-girl rock power trio; study every move, pose, routine, and grimace from every rock show you’ve ever seen; then subtract the need to play instruments. What’s left is pure, balls-out, head-banging bravado. Minus the balls. And what a difference that makes.


If Spinal Tap took the first solid stab at exposing the ridiculousness of the heavy metal scene and rock performance in general, Tia Nina might be the ones who finally tear it all down. In the most entertaining way imaginable, they manage to take decades of faux masculinity and heteronormativity that we know as The Rock Show and totally eviscerate it.

Each woman takes on a different, vaguely familiar rock/metal persona. They barely appear as if they are in the same band, but they don’t seem to care. As they jam along to an original soundtrack (recorded by three otherwise-invisible male co-conspirators) they are only here to bring us The Rock. In the process, fists are pumped, poses are struck, crotches are rubbed, a goat is defiled, chewing gum is thrown, and every bit of kinetic movement is offered up to the same Gods of Rock we’ve all come to know and love. All the while, TN make us question: what the hell have those Gods been having us do all this time?

What is even more impressive is that they occasionally manage to cut through their own parodies to reveal unique personas of their own. Whether there is a New Way presented here is hard to say. You never know that when you first see it. But I definitely found the experience to be transcendent. The Rock is such a rich, deep, broad, long, and hard genre to penetrate, and they do it so thoroughly within an hour’s time that you feel deeply satisfied by the end.

I don’t know how you could keep a straight face at a Metallica or [insert favorite dude band here] concert after seeing Tia Mia take control of the stage. My wife and I were laughing all the way home. Our minds were jumping between what we had just seen and memories of ridiculous concerts we have sat through. I was once an old-school rocker struggling against the machismo aspect of it all, so the show really hit home for me.

Tia Nina is wielding the full power of satiric humor in one giant faux-phallic hammer. Most political attacks leave room for an overwhelming backlash that can be more annoying than the original institution it is trying to dismantle. Tia Nina leaves room only for you to be laughed at for even trying to respond. This is truly Feminism For The Win. The heart and soul of rock n’ roll may never be the same. Thank the Gods.

The show really needs to be experienced live, but until you can, check out their media page.

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